An Open Letter to Pigs (And Other Picky Eaters)



photo by David Merrett

Dear Pigs,

By the way, may I call you that? Pigs? It’s meant with the utmost respect, and after all, it is your name. Believe me, pig. I’ve never used your name in vain when referring to perverts or sleazeballs. I don’t know who started that. Uncool. Nor have I ever said, “Go clean up, you filthy pig!” to either of my kids or my husband. Even that time when they were so foul I wouldn’t let them in the house without hosing off in the backyard first. I’ve read that elephants and rhinos are much dirtier than pigs, but the dirtiest of all, obviously, is the dung beetle. Just so you know, whenever possible I do correct people by saying, “Go clean up, you filthy dung beetle!”

Okay, that’s not why I’m writing you. I need to talk to you about the state of pigs. Read more on the Huffington Post:

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  1. Wanted you to know this made me laugh over my bacon and I’m not too pigheaded not to want to share this on my blog!
    Thanks Eva–am reposting this on

    1. From one ham to another, thank you!

  2. Reblogged this on chocofigbee.

    1. This is outstanding. I fell on the floor laughing. OMG. I can’t stop! 😀 😀 😀

      1. Thanks for visiting, CUT the Crap! So glad you enjoyed…

        1. You are welcome. 🙂

  3. This is outstanding. I fell on the floor laughing. OMG. I can’t stop! 😀 😀 😀

    • Lillie Bryen

    • 9 years ago

    Who else but you would come up with the idea to write a letter to pigs? You, thank goodness!

    1. But will they listen? that’s the question…

  4. This is hilarious Eva!!! Love it!!! And that photo of piggy overweight!!! I’m afraid now to use piggy’s name in vain! 🙂

    1. Thank you, Rina! Don’t forget, the dung beetle is much dirtier…

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